Archive for Wall Street

BUSTLINES DROOP AS ECONOMY SAGS

Posted in Humorously Speaking with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 10, 2009 by andeeroo

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Maura Moynihan just wrote a great editorial on America’s sagging economy and drooping bustlines being inescapably harnessed together.

Plastic surgery is in a free fall.

Joan Rivers are you listening through those tightly pinned back ears?

Michael and LaToya, stop UNwrinking your noses.

(At least I know Bruce Jenner cannot close his eyes or turn his head from the truth that follows)

After 12 billion dollars of spending on cosmetic surgery in 2007 Monynihan reveals the ASPS “reports a 62 percent overall decrease in cosmetic surgery from 2007 to 2008.”

That’s right. The future Pamela Andersons in our world have been hugely deflated by the Lehman brothers and Michael Madoffs of Wall street.

But are a few less bleached blondes teetering about like fully inflated water landing devices such a bad thing?

In  Los Angeles, the elderly will once again walk down the street without fear of being  struck to the ground when an actress turns to acknowledge a car horn.

Average citizens will no longer be late trapped in an endless wait – while elevators sit paralyzed – doors opening and closing,  opening and closing.


Now, the Rodeo Drive and Hamptons crowds may be taking this as a double whammy when coupled with the Oct. 19 (UPI) research from Sweden discovering drinking a lot of coffee reduces the size of many women’s breasts.

Starbucks has been in an uphill battle to offset their shrinking sales to women since that Lund University report

It’s unfortunate when economic hard times hit advertising and the cosmetic surgery industry so hard “above” the belt. But at least now the women of America won’t be so quick to mortgage the house on a windblown face, tucked tummy or a set of personal air bags.

And even though these people may start to look their age. . . there’s no guarantee they’ll act it.

Read Maura’s article on “The Great Boob Bust” at: http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-01-10/the-great-boob-bust/2/

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Punchline: What are you NOT thankful for?

Posted in A Merry Heart with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 27, 2008 by andeeroo

Let it be known that I am thankful for many things this Thanksgiving holiday: my faith, family, friends and health to name just a few.

However, I will not hide the fact that there are many things in this world I am NOT thankful for! After you give thanks, take a moment to fess up.

I’ve compiled a brief list from a few from friends I queried. Please take a look at them and submit that thing you’re NOT thankful for:

Manually fillable ice cube trays   – Kendall

Phillip Seymour Hoffman in a Thong   – Teresa

Metric Tapeworms   – Mary

High water pants with white shoes   –  Luke

Fish Poetry   – Chris

Pay toilets   – Harry

Animals with holes in them   – Chelsea

Wall Street bailout beneficiaries   – Lee

Douvet Covers    – Holly

People in ski masks   –  Jonavan

Anime fillers and itchy socks   –  Rick

Political promises – Andy

Bird poop   – Jake

Abbreviations   – J

Dog fashions   –  Sid

The Detroit Lions   – Jeremy

Ten gallon hats and small minds   – Devin

People who say “irregardless and nevertheless”   – Nat