Archive for Jesus

‘TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE SECULAR, WINTER HOLIDAY

Posted in A Merry Heart, Humorously Speaking with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 12, 2008 by andeeroo

So it’s the holiday season and we’re all having to listen to the absurd legal arguments against public displays that celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa.  Then it hit me: how would Clement Clarke Moore craft his famous poem if he lived in America today? Here’s my take:

‘Twas the night before secular, winter holiday – that’s what it’s called now,

and not a religious figure was stirring, not even a sacred cow.

The children were dressed in blankets and towels with care,

Planning to act in a manger scene on the town square.

But the politically correct were horrified and appalled,

So the ACLU filed lawsuits having the performance outlawed.

And the Rabbi at City Hall with his menorah ready to light,

found his Hanukkah display outlawed in this bizarre legal fight.

And at the public park where the Kwanzaa display had arisen,

The local constables were taking the folks in Dashikis to prison.

Then suddenly, on the White House lawn there arose such a clatter,

I flipped on CNN to see what was the matter.

All across America there came a breaking story,

Covered by every TV host, even Springer and Maury.

As the moon beamed down on new-fallen snow,

It gave a revealing light to the holiday battle below.

Now who should appear on the TV almost before you could tune it,

But a Rabbi, Joseph and Mary and the Hip-Hop group, Kwanzaa Unit.

All together they started to lay down a rap so captivating and quick,

I thought it was lip sync’d, the old Milli Vanilli trick.

But the beatboxing was masterful and the rhymes they were spittin’,

And they whistled, and shouted, and the viewers were smitten.

“Yo, one – two check on the mic, ain’t we lookin’ glossy,

This is MC Rabbi with K-Unit,and the Bethlehem 3,  my number one posse.

Why all the Po-Po arriving to stick us on the jail bus?

Cause we celebrate our faith in something bigger than us.

Whether it’s restoring God’s Temple, baby Jesus or African tradition,

Recognizing these events shouldn’t cause such perdition.

The ACLU hates us, they ain’t down with permission,

So, they make threats and lawsuits to put us out of commission.

What’s the problem with a menorah, the creche’ or a Kwanzaa kinara?

We celebrate Columbus, the Earth and Valentine’s Day.”

Then, as fast they could, this eclectic group leapt

from 1600 Pennsylvannia to the Supreme Court steps.

“Yo, Stevens, Alito, Scalia and Breyer,

If there’s no room for sacred holidays why don’t you retire?

What up Kennedy, Souter, Stevens and Thomas?

Stop endorsing the ACLU’s hating and make us a promise.

Let us honor our cultures, holidays and faith,

Come on Chief Justice Roberts, give us a break.”

Then Robert’s eyes — how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

Alito’s cheeks were like roses, Scalia’s nose like a cherry!

But Ginsburg’s tiny little mouth scrunched tight like a bow,

While the hair on Thomas and Kennedy gleamed white as snow.

Justice Souter’s jaw was clinched tight, grinding his teeth,

And Judge Steven’s ears smoked as his hands shook beneath.

And Breyer’s broad face showed so much reflection,

As the court pondered these citizens, their pain and rejection.

All at once, in a flash, appeared a jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.

With a wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

He let me know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

putting tolerance in the heart of anti-Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa jerk.

Then pointing his finger toward the Senate and House of Reps,

He magically appeared on the Capitol steps.

There he lit the menorah and the kinara, too,

as he gave the baby Jesus a hug, you could hear cows moo.

Then, he jumped in his sleigh, and as he drove out of sight, He shouted:

“Happy ChristmaHanuKwanzakah! Now, just stop the silly legal fight.”

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Career Change Off-Limits to Porn Star?

Posted in The Hell You Say!, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on November 25, 2008 by andeeroo

Several years ago Louisa Tuck (stage name, Crystal Gunns) exploited plastic surgery and personal innocence in exchange for fast money. Today she works with children in elementary school and the YMCA in Vineland, New Jersey. By every measure, a career change in an honorable direction.

But Louisa Tuck has come under fire from parents and education administrators. They have no grounds for her dismissal based upon her work. She has proven herself to be positive and effective in her work with children. But her past still lives on through the internet and other media sources. And that past raises fears of parents and educators in Vineland.

Now the school board of Vineland has been tossed this hot potato and asked for a verdict.

Board of Education President Frank Giordano wants Louisa Tuck fired. He let concerned parents know if it was his decision alone, he would fire her and worry about consequences later.  District Superintendent  Lawyers for the school district have said no action should be taken against Tuck; she has done nothing to violate her duties as a Teacher’s Aide.

Two important issues beg discussion here:

#1 Jesus constantly demonstrated forgiveness to others and directed those people toward a redeemed life.  shouldn’t people (particularly of faith) offer a second chance to this woman?

#2  Five years removed from her former life, has Ms. Tuck significantly demonstrated her desire to leave her past behind and serve in a job that benefits children? If not, what amount of time marks the tipping point for her to clear her past?

So, is this a just war waged on Louisa Tuck or a modern-day stoning taking place in New Jersey?